Not that I wished it otherwise. Who could blame them for taking advantage of a magical loophole that allowed them to date women out of their league? But as I trudged home to face another evening of reruns of The Office and left-over sushi from , I wondered at what cost. For the most part, I was happy for them. I inwardly congratulated myself for having beat the odds. Western women in Asia were like the Jennifer Anistons of the expat world. My boss had been right. But in Asia, dating rules defy all logic or evolutionary law. Strong, independent, assertive and outspoken, they were interesting to admire from afar, but no man would ever dream of striking up a conversation with one.
Not that I wished it otherwise. And through their Western, wire-rimmed eyes, they viewed relationships as an equal partnership, which was something the more traditional, close-minded of Japanese men still struggled to do. Western women in Asia were like the Jennifer Anistons of the expat world. They were straight-forward and open-minded, for one thing. But in Asia, dating rules defy all logic or evolutionary law. But as I trudged home to face another evening of reruns of The Office and left-over sushi from , I wondered at what cost. But as wide-spread as the problem seemed to be, it was one that many women avoided talking about. And all of them were pressed up against the model-thin bodies of a heavily made-up Japanese Beauty Queen. Not true for their Y-chromosome-carrying expat buddies though. While the female expats spent Saturday nights alone, crying into their Ramen bowls, their male counterparts drank freely from the dating pool like they owned it. The Japanese women were gourmet truffles, while the western women were the three-year-old tootsie rolls melted to the bottom of the barrel. Furthermore, I was bilingual, well-traveled and college-educated. Strong, independent, assertive and outspoken, they were interesting to admire from afar, but no man would ever dream of striking up a conversation with one. They were true success stories. When not even a short skirt or slinky top attracted more than a passing glance and even construction workers, who could usually be counted on for a leer, regarded me with bored, blank expressions, I felt like a Martian. I turned to the Internet for advice and was surprised to learn that the Dateless Western Woman was a familiar character in the expat world, at least judging from the score of postings on expat forums by lonely, single females. For the most part, I was happy for them. All of them were bearded and balding. This would never happen anywhere else in the world. Even the socially awkward deserved to love and be loved. This post may contain affiliate links. I figured that so long as they treated their girlfriends well and both partners were happy with the arrangement, what did it matter if their peculiar quirks and bizarre comments got lost in translation a little? But they were the minority. Which in a way, they did. Most western women came to Japan single and stayed that way.
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